The RedKat & Joffa Useless Article Thread


The RedKat & Joffa Useless Article Thread

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MVFCSouthEnder
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RedKat wrote:

:lol: Saw that on Ladbible, absolutely obviousLADS
afromanGT
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Benjo wrote:
Quote:
hes lying....everyone must have seen some porn at some time whether it was intentional or not.

Not this guy. He's Indian and comes from a staunch Christian household. He frowns upon anything slightly sexual, to the point where he covers his eyes during sex scenes in movies (does that classify as porn though?) and we have to tell him when its over so he can open his eyes :lol: And he's not gay. He made a huge speech in English last year against gay marriage.

“Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts; that's their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm. . . . Sounds like . . . every commercial on television, doesn't it?” - Bill Hicks.

A sex scene in a movie would stimulate sexual thoughts. It's 21st century western society, there's no way to avoid some kind of pornographic intent.

As for speaking out against gay marriage, in 2010 anti-homosexual campaigner George Rekers was outed as homosexual so that doesn't mean much.
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afromanGT wrote:
As for speaking out against gay marriage, in 2010 anti-homosexual campaigner George Rekers was outed as homosexual so that doesn't mean much.

http://gayhomophobe.com/

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8772014
8-[
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SpawningSalmon wrote:
afromanGT wrote:
As for speaking out against gay marriage, in 2010 anti-homosexual campaigner George Rekers was outed as homosexual so that doesn't mean much.

http://gayhomophobe.com/

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/8772014
8-[

I remember reading that study at length after it was published. And I completely forgot that other website existed. Props, SS.
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THE Gold Coast's alleged "buxom bandit" has been busted, her sexy low-cut top replaced by dowdy prison browns.

Well that all went tits up.
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Was anyone else hoping she'd get in a few more robberies just to see some soft porn on Crimestoppers?
afromanGT
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Melbourne would be a heaps better place with more magnets.
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afromanGT wrote:
Melbourne would be a heaps better place with more magnets.



This.
avy1990
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Joffa wrote:
afromanGT wrote:
Melbourne would be a heaps better place with more magnets.



This.


Exactly, the only thing I can criticise about my trip in November was the dire lack of magnets.
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Magnus now: "How cute, and a great idea too. Melbourne needs more magnets. Magnus for Mayor of Melbourne!"

Magnus in 20 years:

"What. a. fucking. idiot."
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avy1990 wrote:
Joffa wrote:
afromanGT wrote:
Melbourne would be a heaps better place with more magnets.



This.


Exactly, the only thing I can criticise about my trip in November was the dire lack of magnets.

Pussy magnets are so hard to come by.
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The internet is populated by one less unresourceful moron. Good.

What is with people asking questions on social networking sites instead of googling it?
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700WLW wrote:
Texas A&M Students form Human Wall to stop Westboro Baptist Protesters

Students heard that Westboro Baptist Church planned on protesting the funeral of a soldier, they formed a human barricade around the funeral service.

Texas A&M alum Lt. Col. Roy Tisdale was killed on June 28 during a training exercise at Fort Bragg, N.C. Tisdale was killed by another soldier who then shot himself.
In the days following the soldier's death, word spread that Westboro Baptist Church members were planning to protest Tisdale's funeral.
Ryan Slezia, a former Texas A&M student, heard of the group's plans and hatched a plot to foil their efforts. He called upon fellow students on a Facebook event page he created: "In response to their signs of hate, we will wear maroon. In response to their mob anger, we will form a line, arm in arm. This is a silent vigil. A manifestation of our solidarity."

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I see we've reached the 'batshit crazy' level of housing recession.
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Quote:
Nic Cage image hijacks woman's job application

A Canadian woman's emailed job application has gone viral after she accidentally attached an image of a wild-eyed Nicolas Cage grinning maniacally instead of her resume.

Vanessa Hojda, 20, was inquiring about an administrative assistant job at York University when she accidentally uploaded an image of the Oscar winner instead of her resume and cover letter, Gizmodo reports.

The self-described "weirdo" said she made the mistake because the image had a very similar file name to the documents she intended to attach.

"I accidentally sent my potential future boss a picture of Nic Cage rather than my cover letter+resume, which was a zip file titled with a bunch of numbers like the jpg i accidentally attached oh my God," Ms Hojda wrote on her blog.

It is unclear whether she succeeded in securing an interview but her application has now been viewed by thousands online.
http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/8497183/nic-cage-image-hijacks-womans-job-application

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LOL
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Quote:
Unauthorised biography claims David Bowie's wife saw him naked in bed with Rolling Stones singer Mick Jagger

From: The Daily Telegraph
July 10, 2012 8:26PM

MORE claims about the The Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger's outrageous love life have emerged.

In a controversial new biography 'Mick: The Wild Life and Mad Genius of Jagger', author Christopher Andersen alleges that the now 68-year-old rocker had a long term love affair with fellow musical genius David Bowie.

A relationship between the two stars has long been rumoured, and now friends and family members of the pair have seemingly confirmed the pair's sexual antics with Andersen, reported website Daily News.

Mick Jagger was obsessed with Angelina Jolie while marrried to Jerry Hall

After meeting in the early 1970s, Andersen says both stars became fascinated with one another, attending each other's concerts and sending gifts to one another.

Not long after their first encounter in 1973, when Mick visited Bowie backstage at one of his concerts, Andersen claims that their relationship quickly turned physical.

"It was the glitter era, and everybody wanted to be part of the bisexual revolution," singer Chuckie Starr tells the author in the book.

"Mick was no different. He was wearing rhinestones, blue eye shadow, and platform shoes."

Quickly becoming fast friends, "Bowie and Jagger were soon spotted everywhere together without their wives: sitting ringside at the Muhammad Ali-Ken Norton bout, hanging out at the London disco Tramp, yelling and stomping their approval at a Diana Ross concert, or just cuddling up together on a hotel room couch," Andersen writes.

"Neither superstar complained when one enterprising photographer snapped the two men in a moment of repose, Bowie tenderly cradling Mick’s head in his lap.

"Bowie also took Mick to gay films."

It was when Bowie's wife at the time Angie came home one day to the abode she shared with her husband in London, that Andersen claims the real nature of Bowie and Jagger's relationship was revealed.

"By October 1973, the Bowies were living on Oakley Street, just a stroll from Cheyne Walk. Angie had been out of town for a few days when she returned home one morning and went straight to the kitchen to make some tea," Andersen writes.

"The Bowies’ maid, who had arrived about an hour earlier, approached the lady of the house with a peculiar look on her face. 'Someone,' she told Angie, 'is in your bed.'"

"Angie went upstairs to her bedroom, slowly pushed the door open, and there they were: Mick Jagger and David Bowie, naked in bed together, sleeping.

"Both men woke up with a start. 'Oh, hello,' said Bowie, clearly taken by surprise. 'How are you?'

“I’m fine,” Angie replied. “Do you want some coffee?”

"Mick, blinking awake, remained silent. Angie returned a few minutes later with coffee and orange juice on a tray.

"While it was not a case of coitus interrupts, Angie 'felt absolutely dead certain that they’d been screwing. It was so obvious, in fact, that I never even considered the possibility that they hadn’t been screwing.”

Andersen alleges in his book that the pair's sexual relationship is also confirmed by back-up singer Ava Cherry.

"Ava Cherry, a backup singer who lived with the Bowies for a time, reportedly told a friend that 'Mick and David were really sexually obsessed with each other'", Andersen writes.

'"Even though I was in bed with them many times, I ended up just watching them have sex,” she said.

"According to Cherry, the relationship was more than just sexual. The two men became 'very close' emotionally and 'practically lived together for several months.'

Bebe Buell, who once dated Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler and gave birth to their daughter, actress Liv Tyler, also tells Andersen that she often had three in the bed encounters with the men.

"Perhaps no one was in a better position to assay the relationship between Bowie and Jagger than Bebe Buell, the tall, stunning Playboy centerfold who conducted affairs with both men that lasted several years," Andersen writes.

"...David quickly seduced her. Not long after, she met Mick at an Eric Clapton concert. At the postshow party, Mick seemed to be reconnecting with his old friend Clapton while at the same time doing his best to lure Buell into bed.

"He was flirting outrageously,” Andersen says Buell recalls.

After finally giving in, Buell says she later began involved with threesomes with both Bowie and Mick.

"Once Bowie and Jagger realised that they were both carrying on affairs with Buell ('Nobody was monogamous. Everybody was sleeping with everybody,' she said) the two stars teamed up to lure her into an orgy or two," Andersen writes.

“I used to get some pretty strange phone calls from Mick and David at three in the morning,” Buell tells Andersen, “inviting me to join them in bed with four gorgeous black women.” Or, she added, “four gorgeous black men.”
.
http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/entertainment/david-bowies-wife-angie-saw-him-naked-in-bed-with-rolling-stones-singer-mick-jagger-unauthorised-biography-claims/story-e6fredpu-1226422915748


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Quote:
Feeling poorly: Sydney's average wage slumps

by: Phil Jacob From: The Daily Telegraph July 11, 2012 12:00AM

SYDNEY'S average wage has slumped below the national average for the first time in history, putting added pressure on families already struggling to survive in one of the most expensive cities on earth.


While Sydney has traditionally been a powerhouse of Australia's economy - providing a magnet for those wishing to add a little extra to their pay packet - the mining boom reversed the nation's fortunes, with Perth now the only capital city to be paying above the average.

Despite both Sydney and Melbourne recently being ranked in the top 10 most expensive cities in the world to live, Sydney workers are now earning 0.1 per cent below the national average of $69,990 a year, while those in Melbourne earn about 1.2 per cent less.

Those in Queensland and South Australia are doing even worse, with Brisbane workers earning salaries 3.32 per cent below the market while Adelaide sits even further below at 4.87 per cent below average.

Perth, thanks in no large part to the mining boom, was the notable exception of all Australian capitals, recording salaries 1.3 per cent higher than the national average.

The research by global management consulting firm Hay Group has found the long-held belief that Sydney and Melbourne-based workers were better paid than their interstate counterparts was simply no longer the case.

"The salary movements across the Australian market over the past 12 months tell an interesting story," Hay Group senior consultant Steven Paola said.

"The pay gap between the resources sector and the rest of the market has widened dramatically, mirroring the trends in the patchwork economy which is currently seeing some sectors struggling while others enjoy boom times."

AMP chief economist Shane Oliver said the wage situation was a huge concern.

"We've got world beating costs here and lagging wages," Dr Oliver said.

"What the data really highlights is that it is now simply too expensive to live in Sydney. We're at a point where buying a house is now unaffordable, so unless that changes, it won't get any easier to live here."

Sydneysider Cassie Zughbi said the cost of living in Sydney was undoubtedly tough but people had to do the best with what they had.

"Everyone always thinks they don't get paid enough and there's no doubt we're up there in terms of the most expensive cities in the world to live," Ms Zughbi said.

Joanne Ghooksian said with Australia becoming such an expensive place to live, she was considering moving away.



CommSec economist Savanth Sebastian said those looking to prop up their salary should consider moving to the Northern Territory.



"The average wage in NT is actually above their big-city rivals," Mr Sebastian said.

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/sydney-news/feeling-poorly-sydneys-average-wage-slumps/story-e6freuzi-1226422961671

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Joffa wrote:
Quote:
Unauthorised biography claims David Bowie's wife saw him naked in bed with Rolling Stones singer Mick Jagger

From: The Daily Telegraph
July 10, 2012 8:26PM

MORE claims about the The Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger's outrageous love life have emerged.

In a controversial new biography 'Mick: The Wild Life and Mad Genius of Jagger', author Christopher Andersen alleges that the now 68-year-old rocker had a long term love affair with fellow musical genius David Bowie.

A relationship between the two stars has long been rumoured, and now friends and family members of the pair have seemingly confirmed the pair's sexual antics with Andersen, reported website Daily News.

Mick Jagger was obsessed with Angelina Jolie while marrried to Jerry Hall

After meeting in the early 1970s, Andersen says both stars became fascinated with one another, attending each other's concerts and sending gifts to one another.

Not long after their first encounter in 1973, when Mick visited Bowie backstage at one of his concerts, Andersen claims that their relationship quickly turned physical.

"It was the glitter era, and everybody wanted to be part of the bisexual revolution," singer Chuckie Starr tells the author in the book.

"Mick was no different. He was wearing rhinestones, blue eye shadow, and platform shoes."

Quickly becoming fast friends, "Bowie and Jagger were soon spotted everywhere together without their wives: sitting ringside at the Muhammad Ali-Ken Norton bout, hanging out at the London disco Tramp, yelling and stomping their approval at a Diana Ross concert, or just cuddling up together on a hotel room couch," Andersen writes.

"Neither superstar complained when one enterprising photographer snapped the two men in a moment of repose, Bowie tenderly cradling Mick’s head in his lap.

"Bowie also took Mick to gay films."

It was when Bowie's wife at the time Angie came home one day to the abode she shared with her husband in London, that Andersen claims the real nature of Bowie and Jagger's relationship was revealed.

"By October 1973, the Bowies were living on Oakley Street, just a stroll from Cheyne Walk. Angie had been out of town for a few days when she returned home one morning and went straight to the kitchen to make some tea," Andersen writes.

"The Bowies’ maid, who had arrived about an hour earlier, approached the lady of the house with a peculiar look on her face. 'Someone,' she told Angie, 'is in your bed.'"

"Angie went upstairs to her bedroom, slowly pushed the door open, and there they were: Mick Jagger and David Bowie, naked in bed together, sleeping.

"Both men woke up with a start. 'Oh, hello,' said Bowie, clearly taken by surprise. 'How are you?'

“I’m fine,” Angie replied. “Do you want some coffee?”

"Mick, blinking awake, remained silent. Angie returned a few minutes later with coffee and orange juice on a tray.

"While it was not a case of coitus interrupts, Angie 'felt absolutely dead certain that they’d been screwing. It was so obvious, in fact, that I never even considered the possibility that they hadn’t been screwing.”

Andersen alleges in his book that the pair's sexual relationship is also confirmed by back-up singer Ava Cherry.

"Ava Cherry, a backup singer who lived with the Bowies for a time, reportedly told a friend that 'Mick and David were really sexually obsessed with each other'", Andersen writes.

'"Even though I was in bed with them many times, I ended up just watching them have sex,” she said.

"According to Cherry, the relationship was more than just sexual. The two men became 'very close' emotionally and 'practically lived together for several months.'

Bebe Buell, who once dated Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler and gave birth to their daughter, actress Liv Tyler, also tells Andersen that she often had three in the bed encounters with the men.

"Perhaps no one was in a better position to assay the relationship between Bowie and Jagger than Bebe Buell, the tall, stunning Playboy centerfold who conducted affairs with both men that lasted several years," Andersen writes.

"...David quickly seduced her. Not long after, she met Mick at an Eric Clapton concert. At the postshow party, Mick seemed to be reconnecting with his old friend Clapton while at the same time doing his best to lure Buell into bed.

"He was flirting outrageously,” Andersen says Buell recalls.

After finally giving in, Buell says she later began involved with threesomes with both Bowie and Mick.

"Once Bowie and Jagger realised that they were both carrying on affairs with Buell ('Nobody was monogamous. Everybody was sleeping with everybody,' she said) the two stars teamed up to lure her into an orgy or two," Andersen writes.

“I used to get some pretty strange phone calls from Mick and David at three in the morning,” Buell tells Andersen, “inviting me to join them in bed with four gorgeous black women.” Or, she added, “four gorgeous black men.”
.
http://www.adelaidenow.com.au/entertainment/david-bowies-wife-angie-saw-him-naked-in-bed-with-rolling-stones-singer-mick-jagger-unauthorised-biography-claims/story-e6fredpu-1226422915748



Hardly revolutionary - this was pretty much an open secret, or a strong rumour anyway, 20-30 years ago.
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dp

Edited by thupercoach: 12/7/2012 09:17:50 AM
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Quote:
Unauthorised biography claims David Bowie's wife saw him naked in bed with Rolling Stones singer Mick Jagger

Oh come on, this has been common knowledge since Dancing In The Street came out in 1985.
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Quote:

Ricky Nixon arrested over assault

DateJuly 15, 2012 - 11:38AM

Disgraced former AFL player manager Ricky Nixon is in hospital after being arrested over an assault early this morning.

Nixon was arrested in Bay Street, Port Melbourne, and was taken to The Alfred hospital.

A police spokeswoman said: "Police were called to a Bay Street property in Port Melbourne just after 3am after reports of an alleged assault.

"A 49-year-old Port Melbourne man was arrested before being taken to The Alfred hospital with minor injuries.

"As the matter is currently under investigation we're not able to provide any further details."

Nixon lives in Port Melbourne with his 27-year-old fiancee, Tegan Gould.

Nixon was arrested in February after an altercation with Ms Gould and was later fined and issued a penalty notice for public drunkeness.

Witnesses at the time are believed to have seen him naked and throwing clothes from his apartment.

Nixon, a former AFL player who later became a high-profile manager, was suspended by the AFL Players' Association last year after an "inappropriate personal relationship" with a then teenage girl.

Nixon and Ms Gould announced their engagement earlier this year.

He was also questioned by police last September following an alleged assault with a guest at his home.





Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/afl/afl-news/ricky-nixon-arrested-over-assault-20120715-223qc.html#ixzz20egT6Wcz

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Ricky Nixon will be a basket case for the rest of his life
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MVFCSouthEnder wrote:
Ricky Nixon will be a basket case for the rest of his life

His ex-fiance was in my club the other night, and tbh if I had to listen to that bimbo's shrill voice for more than the 2 hours that I did, I'd be a fucking basket case as well.
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BBC News wrote:
Oxford University rewrites gender dress code
Oxford University students will no longer have to wear gender-specific academic clothing after concerns it was unfair to the transgender community.

It will mean men can attend formal occasions in skirts and stockings and women in suits and bow ties.

The new rules come after a motion by the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Queer society (LGBTQ Soc) was passed by the students' union earlier this year.

The changes, to start from 4 August, have now been agreed by the university.

Jess Pumphrey, LGBTQ officer, said the change would make a number of students' exam experience significantly less stressful.

Under the old laws on academic clothing - known as subfusc - male students were required to wear a dark suit and socks, black shoes, a white bow tie and a plain white shirt and collar under their black gowns.

Female students had to wear a dark skirt or trousers, a white blouse, black stockings and shoes and a black ribbon tied in a bow at the neck.

If a transgender student wanted to wear subfusc of the opposite sex they had to seek special dispensation from university proctors, who had the power to punish those who breached the rules.

An Oxford University spokesman said: "The regulations have been amended to remove any reference to gender, in response to concerns raised by Oxford University Student Union that the existing regulations did not serve the interests of transgender students."

That seems like Political Correctness gone insane.
afromanGT
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I'm sure that after Simon undergoes the snip and changes his name to Simone he'll still be free to put on a suit if it so takes him.
Krackovich
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Quote:
Totally pants: man sets flat ablaze after attempting to dry his underwear in microwave

DORSET Fire and Rescue were quick on the scene after one ill-informed gent set his pants and socks to broil

A man had to be led from his flat after a fire started when he tried to dry his underpants and socks in the microwave.

Firefighters were called to the blaze on Market Street in Weymouth, Dorset, after concerned neighbours heard a fire alarm.

Residents from the block of flats led the man to safety from his second floor apartment following the fire at 10.45pm yesterday.

The flames were quickly put out by two firefighters wearing breathing apparatus.

A Dorset Fire and Rescue spokeswoman said: "The fire involved two pairs of underpants and two pairs of socks which the occupant had tried to dry by placing in the microwave.

"All items of clothing were destroyed in the fire and there was slight smoke damage to the remainder of the flat.

"The fire safety message here is to never put clothing of any kind in the microwave or an oven to attempt to dry them."

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/weird-news/dorset-fire-caused-by-microwaved-underwear-1226966
KiwiChick1
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Fuck :lol:
avy1990
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My best mate doesnt use Facebook :lol:
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Quote:
The truth is out there: Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny reportedly hook up

From: news.com.au August 10, 2012 4:25PM

HOT news from the XXX-Files: Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny are rumoured to have finally hooked up.

..Nerds everywhere - permission to drool granted.

The X-Files co-stars of nine, beautiful seasons (and two, not-so-beautiful films) are reportedly dating, according to the Huffington Post.

An unnamed source has linked the pair, but Anderson was recently coy when asked if she had a partner.

In an interview with the Sunday Times magazine, she said: "Um... yes... umm... umm... say yes."

Celebrity Dirty Laundry went one further - suggesting the pair have moved in together.

Mulder and Scully? Together? It's just so... paranormal.

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/entertainment/the-truth-is-out-there-gillian-anderson-and-david-duchovny-reportedly-hook-up/story-e6frf96x-1226447730623

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