Does it have to be in that order? Meiwes cut off his victim's penis, fried it in the man's fat and then both tried to eat it before the victim died.

I must admit to not reading the detail. I guess that qualified as fulfilling your fantasy.

Edited by thupercoach: 2/12/2013 04:24:53 PM

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/2013/12/02/10/45/woman-bites-mans-lip-in-oktoberfest-fight-germany

fuck that.

Useful lead in to the "why men don't marry" thread.

The video of it is all kinds of fucked up. Fucking psycho bitch.

I was actually thinking about that the other day. I mean, humans have lived on this planet for how many years? And we haven't evolved beyond getting sunburnt?

At least you'll never have to push out a baby...

Re sunburn (sidetracking a bit) I've been at the Dead Sea in 40 degree heat in Israel and never got sunburnt. Same in Europe. Here in Australia I've got sunburnt in winter.

Actually we have evolved past sunburn - it's called inventing sunscreen, hats and t-shirts. No other species has managed that!

Edited by thupercoach: 10/12/2013 10:44:23 AM

Invention isn't evolution :lol: And mankind won't evolve any further because we change the environment around us to suit us instead of changing to suit the environment.

OR...

We have evolved to the point where we have begun to invent.

Or the aliens dumped us here. Take your pick.

It's hardly useless, but a tad amusing.

Harassed boyfriend jumped to his death after his girlfriend insisted on going into another clothes shop

Tao Hsiao was shopping with his girlfriend in Jiangsu province, east China
After five hours Tao finally had enough and demanded to go home
When she insisted they go into another shop the 38-year-old chucked the bags to the floor and jumped over the balcony

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2520753/Chinese-boyfriend-jumped-death-girlfriend-insisted-going-clothes-shop.html

:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

Now that's a completely proportionate reaction.

If you've ever had the misfortune of going on a shopping spree with your girlfriend...it's tempting. :lol:

We've all been there mate.

That's what she has girlfriends for, really.

Mate, while you're sleeping it off on Sunday mornings, thirtysomething DINK hubbies are being schlepped around from furniture and antique shops to clothing outlets by their missuses. It's a pathetic sight really.

I'm still at work Sunday mornings. :lol:

Also, sucks to be them. I mean, isn't part of a relationship communication?

Edited by afromanGT: 12/12/2013 07:39:47 AM

They're just paying for the bj's.

http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/wa/a/20421302/civil-action-only-option-for-semen-drink/

Was she not suspicious when the seal was broken?

Revolutionary plans for London's SkyCycle show cyclists riding over busy city streets

A 135-MILE cycle path above London could be the next big city innovation with developers planning a never before seen idea - SkyCycle.

By: Tom RawlePublished: Mon, December 30, 2013

The SkyCycle could be London's next big transport move [FOSTER + PARTNERS]

Thousands of cyclists could be peddling freely above the busy city environment as the roads and train lines are flooded with commuters.

The skyway will sit three storeys above the city and be accessible from 200 points across the capital.

Plans for the idea are being developed by Sir Norman Foster, who previously designed the Gherkin and Wembley Stadium.

The world famous architect and keen cyclist believes this revolutionary transport system would be a great idea.

The greatest barrier to segregating cars and cyclists is the physical constraint of London’s streets, where space is already at a premium.
Sir Norman Foster

He said: "To improve the quality of life for all in London and to encourage a new generation of cyclists, we have to make it safe.

"The greatest barrier to segregating cars and cyclists is the physical constraint of London’s streets, where space is already at a premium.

"SkyCycle is a lateral approach to finding space in a congested city. We could create a world-class network of safe, car-free cycle routes that are ideally located for commuters."

Cycle safety is already an issue on many people's lips with six cyclists being killed in London in the space of two weeks throughout November.

Companies behind the development, Exterior Architecture, Foster + Partners and Space Syntax, say the SkyCycle route will use techniques that train line developers used.

This is to make the route safe and effective.

Cyclists could travel over London's busy streets

The cycle highway, which is planned to have 10 routes through the city, will not be cheap though.

Just a four-mile section of the 135 mile network will cost an estimated £220m.

In the last ten years, cycling has increased by 70 per cent in the UK.

After 2012 saw the success of the likes of Bradley Wiggins, Chris Froome and Laura Trott at the Olympics, cycling has become even more popular.

However, cycling casualties on the roads between 2006 and 2011 rose by half.

http://www.express.co.uk/news/science-technology/451208/Plans-for-London-s-SkyCycle-show-cyclists-riding-over-busy-city-streets

www.news.com.au

Plenty of useless articles there on bogan.com.au

Bulawayo pastor inspects ‘cheating’ wife’s privates

Posted On 03 Jan 2014By : zim

A pastor with a local Apostolic church might fall from grace after his wife revealed that he was in the habit of abusing her by forcing her to lie down inspecting her privates to see whether she had not leased his sexual goodies to other man during his absence.

Violet Jamu revealed that her husband Andrew Jamu and pastor at Time Apostolic Church was traumatising her by forcibly checking her organ every time he was suspecting that she had cheated on him.

She said she once reported the matter of the alleged “sex stock-taking” to the police who later reprimanded her husband telling him that it was impossible to “read” the “sex meter” since she would have bathed in the event that slept with another man.

As if it was not enough, she further claimed that she had lost dignity as a result of he husband’s weird behaviour who was also forcing her to go for HIV testing accusing her of being a sleep-around sexual athlete.

Violent opened up her ordeal at the Bulawayo Civil Court where she was seeking a protection order against her abusive husband whom she had sired seven children with.

“I am the applicant in this matter and I am married to the respondent Andrew Jamu under Chapter 5:11 and it still subsists. Andrew is violent and used to physically abuse me before he went blind. In I995 we separated after he suspected that I was having extra-marital affairs. He later asked me to come back to our matrimonial home which I did in 2004 and now he is abusing me after suspecting that I am cheating on him. He is forcing me to go for HIV testing and as a result of this I have lost my dignity.

“He will also force me to lie down and check my organ to see whether I had slept with another man.”

“I went and reported him to the police who told him that it doesn’t work because I would have bathed in the event that I had sex with another man. They said it was not good and I really love my husband,” she said.

In his response Andrew said that he started suspecting that his wife was cheating on him after she was assaulted by another woman who was accusing her of sleeping with her husband.

“I suspected that she was cheating on me after she was assaulted by another woman who was accusing her of sleeping with her husband. The man is alleged to have offered her a chicken and a coke before he indicated to Chiwara at our place that they were in love. The problem with Violent is that she doesn’t want me to reprimand her. If I really don’t love her I would not have remarried her after she went and got married to another man and have three children,” said Andrew.

Presiding magistrate, Miss Marylene Mtshina, granted an interim order compelling the two parties to go for counselling and they would come back to court on January 17 for judgement.

http://zim247.com/da-catches-wife-in-bed-with-harare-dealer/

Pizza delivery driver 'caught on camera having sex with housemate's dog'

Jan 05, 2014 12:01 By Mikey Smith 4 Comments

Surveillance footage allegedly revealed Joshua Werbicki, 22, having sex with a German Shepherd cross that lived in his home

Caught on camera: Joshua Werbicki is alleged to have had sex with a family dogPalm Bay Police
A pizza delivery driver was arrested after he was allegedly caught on camera having sex with a family dog.

Joshua Lee Werbicki, 22, was arrested and charged with felony cruelty to animals on Friday.

Police say he was allegedly caught having sex with a German Shepherd cross which belonged to his housemate on hidden surveillance cameras in his home.

The owner of the animal, described as a family dog, told police he'd noticed his pet had been limping noticeably and had signs of physical injury.

Police reports say the dog also appeared fearful when approached by family members.

Werbicki is being held on $2,500 bail and could be banned from owning or living with any type of pet in the future.



Check out all the latest News, Sport & Celeb gossip at Mirror.co.uk http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/man-has-sex-housemates-dog-2990539#ixzz2pXDuvjkx
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Human body parts 'fall from sky' over Jeddah

9 HOURS AGO JANUARY 06, 2014 3:43AM

HUMAN body parts fell from the sky in the Saudi city of Jeddah Sunday, with police saying they could be the remains of someone trapped in an aircraft's undercarriage bay.
"Police received a telephone call at 2.30 am from a witness reporting the fall of human remains at an intersection in Mushrefa neighbourhood'' in the Red Sea city, spokesman Nawaf bin Naser al-Bouq said in a statement.
Initial indications were that the remains "fell from a plane's landing gear,'' said Mr Bouq, adding that investigations were ongoing.
The report came after a Saudi Arabian Airlines jet made an emergency landing in the city of Medina in the west of the kingdom, injuring 29 people on Sunday.
That aircraft had been travelling from Iran's second city of Mashhad with 315 people on board.
A spokesman for the General Authority of Civil Aviation said there was no connection between the emergency landing in Medina and the Jeddah incident.
In a desperate attempt to cross borders, some people at poorly monitored airports climb inside the bays housing aircraft landing gear.
Most of them freeze to death once the aircraft reach cruising altitude, but some survive.
In 2010, the head of Beirut's airport security resigned after the death of a man who managed to hide in the undercarriage bay of a Saudi-bound jet.
The man's body was found by a maintenance worker who was inspecting the gear of the Saudi-owned Nas Air Airbus A-320 after it landed in Riyadh.


http://www.news.com.au/travel/travel-updates/human-body-parts-fall-from-sky/story-fnizu68q-1226795476460

Man with two penises answers your questions on Reddit

3 DAYS AGO JANUARY 04, 2014

WELL, this is an awkward one.
A man who was born with two penises due to a rare medical condition has hopped onto Reddit for an "Ask Me Anything" session, with spectacularly candid results.
The super-thread has spawned about 15000 questions for the man, who has managed to answer many of them with wit, grace and more detail than we're entirely comfortable with.
The man, known to us only as "DoubleDickDude", has an extremely rare condition called Diphallia. Put simply, he has two fully functional penises. He urinates through both of them, and uses both during sex.
Incidentally, DoubleDickDude is bisexual and is currently in a committed relationship with both a man and a woman. He has "permission to stray only with James Franco", which seems fair enough to us.
We've sifted through the thread and picked out a selection of questions and answers. You're welcome.
There are also (NSFW) photos, but we'll let you discover them for yourself. One step at a time.

1. What was it like growing up, and going through puberty? Did you know you were different, and how did that affect your psyche?
I guess pretty much like any other guy in puberty. Just had two d**ks instead of one. I knew from an early age. But it was not a big deal. My mum said "You just have one extra" and that was it. It wasn't until I was older that it started to be a hassle.
2. How many people in your personal life know that you have two?
The ones who know either know because they are family, or because they are close friends. They don't react much about it or bring it up. It's not like it sprouted out of my pubes last month. It's always been there so it's like ... not really a big deal.
3. Do they both hang to one side of your pants, or do they split the seam?
When I go commando, which is almost always except in winter, they take their own sides. The seam can be a pain sometimes because the skin between them is a little delicate and sensitive.
4. It does seem like it would be the ultimate pick-up line ...
I've used it as one a few times. Years ago. But not any time recently. I usually try not to bring attention to them.
5. How has this affected your sex life?
Don't know how to answer that. It's been there all my life. It was there when I started having sex. So sex for me would be different than for a guy with one d**k ... just like if I suddenly only had one d**k, it'd be different.
6. Do you have a favourite?
Yes. The right one. The left one has a grudge against me for it too.
7. Are there any medical complications?
My prostate gets inflamed if I don't ejaculate enough. I'm probably the only guy with a legit reason to orgasm at least once every day or two days.
8. What's it like having a boyfriend and a girlfriend at the same time? Any awkwardness between the three of you?
Actually no awkwardness. They were a couple before they mutually started dating me. She is straight, and he is bisexual and discovered he was after four months of them both knowing me, they found out about my c**ks. It clicked and we've been together since.
9. What kind of comments do you get from your guy friends?
My friends are so much like me that they don't bring it up often. One or two wise guys will make comments like "She wants the D's" as a joke when a girl smiles at me. But other than that they're so chill about it because they know I don't want the attention.

10. Are you a Ghostbusters fan? Have you ever crossed the streams?
HAHAHAHAHAHA. You can never cross the streams, it would be bad.
11. You've said that having two penises used to be a thing of shame, and now is a thing of pride. How did that happen, was there a certain event or experience that changed your mindset?
Honestly, it was the jerks I was around that made life hell. Once I was done with school, I realised it was something to be proud of ... It's one thing to be KNOWN as the guy with two c**ks and another thing to BE the guy with two c**ks. And being bisexual meant my d**ks were in constant demand. So it got to be kind of a curse for a while.
12. Did you have any nicknames in high school?
A buddy nicknamed me Double D.
13. Do you shower at the Y or wait until you get home?
I generally avoid public bathrooms and if I do use one I try to use the stall and not a wall urinal.
14. Have you ever successfully picked up a chick by telling her you have two d**ks?
In my teens, yeah. But half of them bailed when they realised I was serious.
15. Was there a reason your parents didn't consider having the second one removed when you were a kid?
Yeah. Because I was born with it for a reason. My mum admitted recently she had no idea what that reason was, but it's there so it stays there. Glad she did after everything because I really am one in millions ... It really makes a person feel special knowing there is likely no one else like you alive right now.
16. Was the second Lord of the Rings movie named after you?
The Two Towers. LMAO!
17. Do you think the world would be a better place if every man on Earth had two d**ks?
No. With great power comes great responsibility.
18. Dude. It's like 5am where I'm at and you've been at this for 10 hours. You are like the god of Reddit. Do you ever sleep?
I'll sleep when I'm dead. For now, the man with two d**ks has people to answer.
You can check out the full Reddit thread here . Needless to say, it's not safe for work.
###

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/man-with-two-penises-answers-your-questions-on-reddit/story-fnixwvgh-1226794677506

That is actually a superb read. Killed a few hours at work the other night reading it.

For sale: Four-bedroom terraced house, £650,000 – with previous owners' bodies in back garden


CHRISTOPHER ARDEN Friday 10 January 2014
   
This property could be the ideal family home; situated in a leafy suburb in south-west London, it comes complete with four double bedrooms, four reception rooms, and a reasonably sized back garden. The only problem is that the previous owners are buried under the flower bed.

After running through the usual features and fixtures of the four-bedroom property in Teddington, Middlesex, the estate agent ends the description with a slight surprise: “The rear garden measures approximately 50ft in depth and has significant width. It is important to note that the previous owners last wishes were to be buried in this garden, which is where both currently rest.”

The deceased occupants were Hugh and Joyce Griffin, both thought to be illustrators who worked in the town. Mrs Griffin died two years ago and was buried in the back garden by her husband, Mr Griffin, who later died on 23 February 2013.

The £650,000 property went on the market on Wednesday. Dating from 1875, it is expected to be sold to a developer, as it needs extensive repair work that could amount to an extra £100,000.

Oliver Barron, from Curchods Estate Agents in Teddington, said the house needs “everything doing to it” but admitted that there was a “definite level of interest” in the property. He added that the practice of garden burials was more common than thought in most populated areas of the UK.

If the new owners did want to remove the bodies, they would have to seek permission from the next of kin and pay an estimated £7,000.

The Environment Agency says that there are no laws preventing people from being buried on their own land and there is no need for planning permission; however, authorisation forms must be filled in to meet health regulations and to keep a record of the precise location of the burial site.

Regulators stipulate that garden graves must be at least 30 metres from any running or standing water and 50 metres away from any drinking water sources. The grave must also be deep enough to prevent foxes or dogs from digging up any loved ones.

The Natural Death Centre, a charity for natural burials, provides useful advice on the practicalities of grave digging on its website: “If you are digging a grave yourself, you need to be careful and have help. If you are fit and enthusiastic, it should take about three hours work to dig a four foot deep grave.

“Try and shore up the first two feet of the grave so that it is supported when the mourners stand around it, and work steadily so that you don't strain yourself. You might want to take a bucket to stand on so that you can get out of the grave at the end of a tiring day!”

In November 2013, a man from Colwick, Nottinghamshire, buried his wife in his front garden.

Philip Topham, 56, laid his partner of 18 years, Catherine, to rest after she died from cancer. He told the Nottingham Post at the time: “We’ve had the happiest times of our lives here, and she always saw the positive side of things.”

“I told her where she would be buried when she was alive, and she said she was OK with it,” he said.

He added that he did not care whether it would devalue the property, as “she is worth a million”.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/for-sale-fourbedroom-terraced-house-650000--with-previous-owners-bodies-in-back-garden-9052267.html

Pennsylvania teen Christopher Scheller found to have concealed robbery loot up his rectum

12 HOURS AGO JANUARY 11, 2014 8:31PM

POLICE in Pennsylvania made an "unusual find" after collaring a suspected teenage drink driver. A mountain of buried treasure … up his bum.
Police found the seemingly intoxicated Christopher Scheller, 18, near his car after it crashed into a tree in Southern York County early in December.
Officers had not suspected Scheller of any further naughty behaviour as they had found no junk in his trunk.
However, WHTM-TV reports that when Scheller was sent to hospital for an examination, doctors decided it would be wise to take an X-ray as the teen was in an unusual degree of discomfort.
The image turned up "an abnormality".
Several "abnormalities", in fact.
Scheller refused to have the objects removed. He would be fine, he insisted.
But he wasn't.
Eventually the pain became so great that he consented to being placed on the surgeon's table, under the surgeons' steady, latex-clad hands.
Here's what they found:
- Four bracelets
- Four necklaces
- 11 ladies rings
- A socket wrench
- A bag of synthetic marijuana
Police smelt a rat, among other things.
So they investigated the objects.
It turned out that the items had that evening been stolen from a house in Heidelberg Township.
Scheller, desperate to conceal the evidence upon the arrival of police at the scene of his accident, tried to stash the items.
The first place he thought of was … up his bum.
He was charged with theft, receiving stolen property and driving while under the influence.

http://www.news.com.au/world/pennsylvania-teen-christopher-scheller-found-to-have-concealed-robbery-loot-up-his-rectum/story-fndir2ev-1226799748274

U.S. Medicare programme wasted $172 MILLION on PENIS PUMPS

The Medicare program spent the cash between 2006 and 2011
It paid for nearly 474,000 claims for vacuum erection systems
Yearly claims for devices nearly doubled from $20.6m in 2006
Government waste is major issue in budget talks in Washington

By LEON WATSON
PUBLISHED: 08:55 GMT, 14 January 2014 | UPDATED: 10:20 GMT, 14 January 2014

Taxpayers spent a staggering $172million in six years on penis pumps valued at twice the price they would have cost in a store.
The U.S. government's Medicare program blew the cash between 2006 and 2011, according to a government watchdog's report released yesterday.
The inspector general for the Department of Health and Human Services said the health insurance system for seniors paid for nearly 474,000 claims for vacuum erection systems, or VES, totaling about $172.4 million from 2006 to 2011.

A staggering $172million was spent on penis pumps between 2006 and 2011, a report has revealed
Yearly claims for the devices nearly doubled from $20.6 million in 2006 to $38.6 million in 2011.
According to the Mayo Clinic, penis pumps are one of a few treatment options for erectile dysfunction.
Government waste is a major issue in budget talks in the U.S. capital as lawmakers try to reach agreement on a $1 trillion spending bill.

More...
Congress unveils $1.1 TRILLION spending bill in bid to avoid another government shutdown

'I paid nothing... It was amazing': Shameless actress Emmy Rossum boasts on US television how she got ill in Britain and was given free healthcare

'Medicare payment amounts for VES remain grossly excessive compared with the amounts that non-Medicare payers pay,' said the report, dated December 2013.
'Medicare currently pays suppliers more than twice as much for VES as the Department of Veterans Affairs and consumers over the Internet pay for these types of devices.'
If Medicare had adjusted its payments to approximately the price non-Medicare payers pay, the U.S. government would have saved an average of about $14.4 million for each of the six years, the report said.

According to the Mayo Clinic, penis pumps are one of a few treatment options for erectile dysfunction

'Considering the strain retiring baby boomers will soon be placing on Medicare's budget, shouldn't we be focusing this entitlement program on real, life-saving treatment and equipment to serve the health needs of seniors - instead of subsidizing penis pump purchases?' Ben Domenech of the Heartland Institute think tank said in an email statement.
'And to those seniors who really do want one,' added Domenech, 'just buy it yourself - you don't need to send the bill to your fellow Americans.'


Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2539065/U-S-Medicare-programme-wasted-172-MILLION-penis-pumps.html#ixzz2qMu0igHT
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