How can a fat awkward guy like me strike up a conversation with a girl in a way that doesn't make me seem like I've got other motives?

If you do have motives make them clear otherwise you'll be friend zoned fast than paulc abandoned Roar after Draups #rekt him

Step 1 to stop being awkward, stop saying your awkward.

-PB

Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself

Dudeeeeeee I've mat he's so many people on tinder who turned out to be underage. They all lie about their age on tinder, but when you actually look at their profile after you've matched them, they have their real ages so all to see...

WFMB: Going to start an introduction course for 3D animation in Year 11.

Never thought it was my thing before recently, but looking back I've always loved creating stuff. I used to make Lego stop motion animations when I was nine or ten (while they were shit, it was a lot of fun) and I used to almost obsessively read this book that came with the GTA IV collector's edition with various bits of artwork (2D and 3D). Always thought I'd be something like a forensic scientist, but I think that while I'm fascinated by science and love learning and taking in information in that field, I'm not that great at actually applying it in assignments or essays.

Hopefully it turns out to be something that I really love, as the only reason I stopped drawing and what not is because I never learned actual drawing techniques as a kid and because my art wasn't good as a result, I thought that I'd just always be shit at art and stopped.

Let's get Salmon on tinder!

Mother will be so pleased! :lol:

Funny thing is when I got my brother's old phone a couple weeks ago, it had Tinder on it and he's in Year 11 :lol:

Salmon proved he's not a multi.


1) Stop being fat
2) Stop calling yourself awkward like PB said
3) Accept that you have motives

Expanded:
1) Start working out. You're young and have lots of testosterone so it's easy as fuck to build muscle. Start going to the gym. If you're a fatty then your body is even better prepared because it carries your plumpy arse around all day as it is.

2) You're only awkward if you make yourself awkward. Do you think a chick is more likely to want to suck your dick if you smile at her and make eye contact or if you make eye contact and look away and look shy?

3) You have motives. Accept it. No one in their entire life, in the history of the world, even in the most ridiculous organised marriages or virgins a la American Pie have never been rejected. To climb a ladder, you need to accept that you might actually fuck up and fall. That's life.

Can you win the lottery if you don't buy a ticket? Can you win the lottery if you're mates with someone at the newsagency but still don't buy a ticket? No. But your mate at the newsagency buys them every week. Once you see him win it you'll feel even worse that you never tried in the first place.

So, as for motives - What's wrong with them? Do you honestly want to go out with a hundred girls with all of them thinking that you're not actually interested in fucking them? You don't even need to answer that because we both already know the answer. The point is; accept that you have motives and roll with it. If you're genuinely friends with a girl, awesome! If you genuinely want more, then let it be made obvious without being a full on weirdo by grabbing her at every opportunity.

Really though, all of this shit fails if you aren't confident. You need to smile, even if your teeth are fucked up. You need to walk with a straight back and wide shoulders, even if you have a beer gut. You need to talk, even if you sound like Mike Tyson. I have over 300 matches on Tinder and I've probably fucked 25% of them (EG confirm plz), and that's entirely though being proactive about it. It's harder in high school - trust me, I feel bad for the Hoyts cleaning staff in many a shopping centre - but still possible. For now, get into the gym, start trying to smile more and forget this awkwardness shit about yourself.


Edited by Draupnir: 17/11/2015 11:10:51 PM

If you are 16 turning 17, aren't you in year 11 already? Thought the cut off was 1 May in SA.

I'm 15, turning 16 next week.

upd8z

The gym is good and working out can be great for your confidence, but if you want to slim down then it's all about eating better/less.

Hey salmon check out this website if you're interested in joining a gym :
http://www.maxchallenge.com.au/2014/maxs/mobile/index.php

They do a challenge and you can win prizes. Unfortunately the next one isn't till feb next year. The benefit of it is that it gives beginners a full body workout plan and menu plan as well as loads of information.

If you are thinking of joining the gym shoot me a private message and I'll see if i can find my old pdf's of one of the previous maxs challenge.

Exercise, whether cardio and/or weights is by far the best thing to do. It builds self confidence, pride in appearance and image, mental strength (you get less worked up over things and seem more relaxed) and you begin to look healthier. All of these dramatically increase your attractiveness to the ladies. Plus you're young so you can change quite quickly. That would be my first advice. Everything else will come naturally after that. But don't mention that you work out. Make it out as though it's a small part of your life otherwise you'll sound like Ron burgundy.

Fuck all of ya cunts I told salmon to hit the weights first.

salmon should be losing weight by banging easy chicks from high school. Don't worry about quality mate, practice with the fat ones or pizza faces then by the time you get a good one you wont suck that much.

Not sure there are any easy chicks at my school.

Lol Radelaide girls are about as easy as they get. Just sneak into a pub one night look for 18th and bang one of them.

You'll be a god if you go back to school on a Monday and brag about banging 18 year olds

Edited by scotty21: 19/11/2015 07:35:00 AM

WFMB: Just demolished my final exam

Honestly, Salmon. Take up cycling. It's a lot more enjoyable than running, and you go a lot faster. Iv'e just taken it up again, and I'm certainly no CK model. Found out how unfit I am too. Hills are a bitch, but with time they'll get easier. You also get to wear lycra pants. :lol:

He aint lying about being not to keen on the eyes salmon :D.

Na Heine is a sexy beast

Cycling sucks ass when your large, unfit and haven't cycled before. And that's from 1st hand experience.

But if you can cycle every day for 2 weeks even 5 minutes at a time you will fine it becomes pretty easy. And you notice your fitness improve quite quickly.

You need to cycle for about 1-2 hours per day to get a good workout though.

With running it only needs to be about 20-30 mins for a good workout - but don't start straight away with running as you'll get injured.

Get an app called "couch to 5km". Starts off with walking and gently builds you up to running that distance.

It all depends on intensity.
You cycle up hills and 30 minutes will annihilate you.

My preference is always a well structured gym program with some high intensity interval training such as hill sprints.

The problem with Adelaide is that it's pretty flat. The hills that surround the city are pretty good but if salmon didn't live close enough to them it'd be pretty the consuming to get to. Especially as he's not old enough for drivers license yet.

I wouldn't actually advise cycling like i said earlier it sucks. It is beneficial but it's hard.

Gym and hiit is the way to go by a long way. Since training to be a PT i have helped about 10 friends go from quite overweight to fairly fit. And they all did a combination of diet/gym/hiit & supplementation.

I've always been a pretty avid cycler myself. Stopped for a few years due to Uni and work commitments. I do it for fitness and for fun. I just like cycling. Good for the environment, too. ;)

I'm planning on hitting the gym soon. At the moment, just enjoying being back in the saddle.