buddha69
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avy1990 wrote:
The awkward moment when you wake up to two of your brothers girlfriends friends sitting in your room.
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martyB
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The awkward moment when you walk into a phone shop, turn on a phone's screen to see the person before you has just googled PornHub and the salesman comes over and says "can I help you?" *home screen! home screen!!*
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Joffa
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The awkward moment when you discover a condom in your can of tomatoes Quote:Woman discovers condom in can of tomatoes It's the fear of many who buy pre-packaged food - finding something gross in it. For a woman in Brazil, that fear became reality when she ate a dish of savoury meatballs with tomato sauce only to discover a condom in the tomato can. According to the Globo news website, US$5000 (NZ$5745) will be awarded in damages. The southern state of Rio Grande do Sul fined the tomato sauce maker the amount for "moral damages". Judge Joao Gilberto Marroni Vitola said in his ruling that the experience had "profoundly disgusted the family". The tomato sauce company claimed that its entire production and packaging process was automated. Ad Feedback - Stuff http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/5355193/Woman-discovers-condom-in-can-of-tomatoes
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Heineken
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Well, play safe...eat safe... Was it opened or un-opened?
WOLLONGONG WOLVES FOR A-LEAGUE EXPANSION!

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Joffa
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The awkward moment when you only have a butter knife Quote:Man attempts self-surgery with butter knife A US man stuck a butter knife into his belly in a failed bid at self-surgery to remove a painful hernia, police have said. The wife of the 63-year-old Southern California man called 911 on Sunday night (Monday, NZ time) and told the emergency operator her husband was using a knife to remove a protruding hernia, Sergeant Tom Lorenz said. "She said he had impaled himself with a knife," Lorenz said. Officers found the man naked on a patio lounge chair outside his apartment with a 15cm butter knife sticking out of his stomach. The man's wife told officers that her husband was upset about the hernia and wanted to take it out. While waiting for paramedics, the sergeant said, the man pulled out the knife and stuffed a cigarette he was smoking into the bleeding, open wound. "What he was thinking, I don't know. I don't know if he was cauterising it (the wound)," Lorenz said. The man wasn't screaming or showing any signs of pain, the sergeant said. Based on his actions and statements from the wife, Lorenz said the man was placed on psychiatric hold and taken to Los Angeles County-USC Medical Centre. Because he's on psychiatric hold for up to 72 hours under the state Welfare and Institutions Code, Lorenz said the man's name and condition cannot be released. "You just never know what to expect," said Lorenz, who has been on the police force for 29 years. "I've seen self-mutilation, but not a manoeuvre like this." http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/5347101/Man-attempts-self-surgery-with-butter-knife
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Heineken
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Joffa wrote:The awkward moment when you only have a butter knife Quote:Man attempts self-surgery with butter knife A US man stuck a butter knife into his belly in a failed bid at self-surgery to remove a painful hernia, police have said. The wife of the 63-year-old Southern California man called 911 on Sunday night (Monday, NZ time) and told the emergency operator her husband was using a knife to remove a protruding hernia, Sergeant Tom Lorenz said. "She said he had impaled himself with a knife," Lorenz said. Officers found the man naked on a patio lounge chair outside his apartment with a 15cm butter knife sticking out of his stomach. The man's wife told officers that her husband was upset about the hernia and wanted to take it out. While waiting for paramedics, the sergeant said, the man pulled out the knife and stuffed a cigarette he was smoking into the bleeding, open wound. "What he was thinking, I don't know. I don't know if he was cauterising it (the wound)," Lorenz said. The man wasn't screaming or showing any signs of pain, the sergeant said. Based on his actions and statements from the wife, Lorenz said the man was placed on psychiatric hold and taken to Los Angeles County-USC Medical Centre. Because he's on psychiatric hold for up to 72 hours under the state Welfare and Institutions Code, Lorenz said the man's name and condition cannot be released. "You just never know what to expect," said Lorenz, who has been on the police force for 29 years. "I've seen self-mutilation, but not a manoeuvre like this." http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/5347101/Man-attempts-self-surgery-with-butter-knife :lol: Fucking looney. :lol: Pretty sure that belongs in the Darwin Award thread.
WOLLONGONG WOLVES FOR A-LEAGUE EXPANSION!

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Monster
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The awkward moment when a Teenage girl asks to sit next to you on a crowded bus, and you accidently say: "Go ahead, Babe" Edited by Monster: 29/7/2011 04:35:20 PMEdited by Monster: 29/7/2011 04:35:32 PMEdited by Monster: 29/7/2011 04:35:43 PMEdited by Monster: 29/7/2011 04:35:53 PM
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catbert
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The awkward moment when the mum of the girl you like (who you have never met before) knows you by name.
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keepersball
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The awkward moment when you find out that the really cute girl you've been chatting up for ages and is finally taking a big interest in you, is your real good mate's cousin...
I can't believe I didn't know that :(
11.mvfc.11 - that's just nasty.
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keepersball
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11.mvfc.11 wrote:keepersball wrote:The awkward moment when you find out that the really cute girl you've been chatting up for ages and is finally taking a big interest in you, is your real good mate's cousin...
I can't believe I didn't know that :( What's wrong with that? I'm actually actively setting up my mate with my cousin in Brisbane while we're on an away trip for NYE lmao He's very big on family haha. + He is apparently really close with his cousin. Close enough for me not to find out though?
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Monster
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11.mvfc.11 wrote:The awkward moment when you walk into the kitchen/lounge room to get your water bottle before bed and find your dad going down on his girlfriend :?
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mus-28
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11.mvfc.11 wrote:The awkward moment when you walk into the kitchen/lounge room to get your water bottle before bed and find your dad going down on his girlfriend :? Maybe he's contemplating a future in gynocology and was just taking a closer look at what he's gonna be dealing with?
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afromanGT
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Could have been worse, 11.mvfc.11, could have been your nan...
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KiwiChick1
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TAMW your sister wants you to set her up with this guy who you actually also happen to like quite a lot :lol:
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Carlito
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11.mvfc.11 wrote:The awkward moment when you walk into the kitchen/lounge room to get your water bottle before bed and find your dad going down on his girlfriend :? :-& :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
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afromanGT
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KiwiChick1 wrote:TAMW your sister wants you to set her up with this guy who you actually also happen to like quite a lot :lol: Well unless you're going to get it together and make a move for him then you should probably help her out :lol:
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Funky Munky
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TAMW Meatloaf tries to sing.
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WastedYouth
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TAMW: When you knock over your mum's expensive china vase and have to stare into her distraught eyes looking at the broken pieces.
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martyB
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TAMW: You and the only 2 rostered [17yo female] staff are caught walking out of the manager's office together by the off-duty [female] assistant manager who is on the phone with the [female] store manager. :oops:
TAMW: One is buttoning up her blouse as we walk out. Fuck knows why, I obviously missed something.
TAMW: Said assistant manager yells so all customers can hear, "OMG he's walking out of the office with them right now!"
TAMW: you wish something funky had actually gone on in there.
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afromanGT
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You need to up your game, marty. :lol: every guy dreams of moments like that!
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avy1990
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TAMW: The new girl housemate walks to the hallway and joking gives me a death stare.. I return the favour and look away, as she walks into the bathroom and I yell out.. 'Im watching you!' which was bad timing.
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Heartinator
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avy1990 wrote:TAMW: The new girl housemate walks to the hallway and joking gives me a death stare.. I return the favour and look away, as she walks into the bathroom and I yell out.. 'Im watching you!' which was bad timing. :lol: :lol:
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martyB
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TAMW: you shake another guy's hand and it's either limp or they have hands like a chick.
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afromanGT
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martyB wrote:TAMW: you shake another guy's hand and it's either limp or they have hands like a chick. Nothing worse than a limp handshake. TAMW your lesbian friend says she doesn't like seafood.
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catbert
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TAMW you misread the Headline "Clinton seeks Afghan talks" as "Clint Bolton seeks Afghan talks"
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Heineken
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catbert wrote:TAMW you misread the Headline "Clinton seeks Afghan talks" as "Clint Bolton seeks Afghan talks" I hear he's in talks with Kabul FC. I heard Taliban & Jihad United were interested, too :lol:
WOLLONGONG WOLVES FOR A-LEAGUE EXPANSION!

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leftrightout
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TAMW My 31 year old brother who still lives with my parents just told me he thought my parents were out of the house, he took a one night stand home, put a sock on the bedroom door and in the heat of the moment... in walks Dad. :lol:
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catbert
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leftrightout wrote:TAMW My 31 year old brother who still lives with my parents just told me he thought my parents were out of the house, he took a one night stand home, put a sock on the bedroom door and in the heat of the moment... in walks Dad. :lol: :lol: he walked in pretty obviously i presume?
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martyB
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catbert wrote:leftrightout wrote:TAMW My 31 year old brother who still lives with my parents just told me he thought my parents were out of the house, he took a one night stand home, put a sock on the bedroom door and in the heat of the moment... in walks Dad. :lol: :lol: he walked in pretty obviously i presume? "No no no, you're doing it wrong!"
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Heartinator
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TAMW you accidentally fart in your bosses face.
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