you only yolo once #yoyoloo

She's a woman, she's meant to.

Stoked on the fact that this thread has sparked up lately :lol:

Really enjoying it

KC, you're in university. Make yourself do something you're not used to. You can't keep backing out of things because you're nervous or shy or uncertain. Time to take a deep breath and go sit in the dentist chair.

I'm already miles outside of my comfort zone, and it's only going to get worse since I kind of got asked out today, and the guy isn't going to give up unless he thinks I'm completely uninterested.

So are you interested or not?

Today was the second time I've actually had a conversation with him. He's a cool guy, really interesting, but I don't really know how I feel about him, it's kind of sudden.

Then go out with him and find out.

when you say kind of got asked out - do you mean he said "will you go out with me" or did he say "we should do something sometime"?

I'm not sure if I should be sharing this, but he thought I was flirting with him and giving him signals and stuff and so he let me know that he's keen on me, and I basically have a month to decide whether or not I want a relationship with him, because he has no interest in being just friends with someone that he has feelings for :?

:lol: he gave you a timeframe?

That's alpha as fuck.

at what age do kiwis go to uni - 16?

not to sound "mature" and "snobbish" but the way the situation is going down seems to be extremely highschool-y. who lays down an ultimatum, and expresses legit feelings to, to someone they've talked to twice? i like his enthusiasm, i like his upfront-ness, but he needs to calm the fxxx down.

you need to tell him you guys aren't in high school anymore, you need to let potential feelings develop naturally, and you don't mind the idea on going on a date or two & the rest can work itself out later if it works out.

Two important things, one general and one a lot more specific:

1) There is no rule against dating someone then dumping them if you don't see it working out.

2) People who have "feelings" for someone they have talked to twice generally have problems. Not necessarily deal breaking but can run the gamut from "shy and inexperienced" to "full on deranged". Be warned. This ties into point 1, as there is a real risk that if you do not see him as a viable boyfriend he will initiate super-clingy mode and refuse to accept that you aren't interested. This has happened to a number of my female friends, most recently one who had a guy profess his endless love to her after a week, that week including breaking up with her via SMS (warning klaxons) after she had the gall to help out another friend and miss an extra hour of hanging out with him (they had spent all day together.) He is still under the delusion that they can be friends, with definite subtext of "I'm holding out 'til you're ready".

Not saying this guy is like that, but be warned. They do exist. Have exit strategies- if you can't avoid them in everyday life or if you rely on them for anything (projects etc) dating is inadvisable.

EDIT: pv4 is bang on the money wrt how to deal with this situation.

Edited by scoll: 26/3/2013 03:26:39 PM

Agree with all of the above, especially the clingy bit.

Tread with caution, else the WGMG thread will be your home for months on end.

He's asking you to go out with him, not to marry him. The point of dating someone is to get to know them and see how you feel about them. It's not the be-all and end-all. There's more to dating than it just being a vessel to get into people's pants.

Go out with him, if it doesn't work for you there's nothing wrong with telling him that. As Scoll said, there's no rule saying you can't dump someone if things don't work out.

This, I can't claim a trove of experience, but the 'fuck it why not?' approach seems highly applicable.
Uni dude, go with it.

Oh FFS. I just got asked out by the guy who I mentioned was being really flirty with me. What the actual fuck is going on? I can't deal with this shit.

porque no los dos?

See KC, you were never going to be forever alone.

I actually really want to go back to being invisible.

I don't know how to react to people openly being interested in me. It just isn't something I'm used to.

He's very sure of himself.

Can someone PM me?

Are there any gay guys on these forums?

I had an experience on Saturday that I'd like to discuss.

Sent you one

PM Girt

I am starting to think that being asexual would be way easier.

@notor, socceroos_fan is isn't he? Pretty sure that blacka is as well.

Chill out. Say yes, go out on a date. If he makes a move tell him "I don't on a first date". If things go well and he asks if there's a next time, tell him "maybe". And if you enjoy yourself, the next move is up to you.

There's no emotional involvement here, you're going out with someone and getting to know them, not jumping straight into a committed relationship.

Dating is like a job interview: You get dressed up all nice, try to impress each other and with a bit of luck you get called back again. Just because you have job interview with one company doesn't mean you can't speak to other companies. Oh, and there's the bonus of being able to drink alcohol ;) Just don't get too drunk :P

S_F doesn't come on here any more, does he?

There's a few posters I've had suspicions about, but iunno.

So it wouldn't be wrong of me to go on two different dates with two different guys? I just don't want to feel like I'm stringing anyone along.